That Was Then, This Is Now
by The Original Bad Girl Nicole
Summary: Buffy is dying, but the Powers That be have something else in mind. Question is, will she take it?
1. Buffy's Visitor

Title: That Was Then This Is now

Author: Nicole

Disclainers:Nope they don't belong to me they belong to Joss and Co pouts

Pairing: B/F eventually

Summary: Buffy is dying, but The Powers that be have something else in mind. Question is will Buffy take it or not?

Author's Notes: I know I am not supposed to be writing another story until I completed my other ones. This would not leave me alone; it's a lot different than my other stories and a product of hard work and lots of thinking.

Distribution: If you want it let me know, ask and you shall receive but I guarantee it won't be given up that easily.

Notes 2: This story is dedicated to the love of my life; I love you forever and always.

Introduction

There are times when we are given choices and paths we must take. What happens when you take the wrong path and things don't turn out how you want them? This is a story about choices and how the wrong ones can affect the future. Everyone thinks we can play with our lives, but we are all just players in the game. My friend Buffy has had a hard life since she became the slayer. The choices she made predicted the outcome of her future. See destiny, fate and chance are very tricky things, I should know. But what if in a moment of weakness or clarity you are given the chance to go back and redo all the choices you made to predict a different future. You are probably looking at me like I have grown a second head, but it could be possible if you believe. Buffy will be given the choice to go back into time and rewrite everything that's happened. It's up to her if she is going to take it or not.

You see, Buffy has made choices in her past that lead to a future of self-destruction and heartache. She had the chance to fulfill and change her destiny, but she chose to go down the wrong path. Buffy's dying at the hands of the master pretty much changed things in her, but what if she didn't have to face the master alone? What if she had help? Would things be different? That we will never know, but then again if she were given a second chance, I think things would change.

I know you are saying "Get on with the story." Well I am getting there, I just wanted to make sure that you're sitting there scratching your heads and looking dumbfounded. This is a story of Buffy's life and how she gets the second chance to change it. Watch as the story unfolds...

Buffy lay still in her bed, the machines beeping all around her. She was slowly losing her battle with the cancer that had come back full swing. Her room was partially dark with only a faint light illuminating her frail body. A lone figure was standing in the doorway watching as the tiny blonde slept. She watched as the machines did their jobs, checking her blood pressure, monitoring her heart and administering the meds she needed. With a resounding sigh the woman entered the room a little more and sat in the chair beside her bed. She took a frail hand in hers and smiling softly, began to whisper.

"How did you get here Buffy? You said everything was fine and that you were ok. I got the message from Dawn saying you were deteriorating." Her voice trailed off as tears threatened.

The woman looked around the room, gazing at all of the pictures and cards adorning the walls and shelves. It never really occurred to her just how much the little blonde was loved. She looked on the nightstand and saw a picture of herself with her two girls Elizabeth and Angelina. Angelina had just turned 5, and everyone was there except for Buffy. She wasn't feeling all that well, but sent a present along with Dawn for the little girl that she loved so much. She glanced over to the bed again.

"Ya know, Angelina asks about you everyday. When is her Aunt Buffy coming to see her? I have to explain to her that you won't be visiting because you are sick. It's hard on her being so little and all. She really loves you and when she smiles, she looks like you."

A smile played on her lips as she said it, thinking how funny it was that the little girl looked so much like the blonde. It just melted her heart and made her long for the other woman more.

A nurse came into the room and looked at the other woman. They exchanged smiles as she wrote down the statistics of Buffy's vitals.

"She seems to be doing a lot better today than she was yesterday. A little color came back into her skin." The nurse commented as she continued documenting her findings.

The other woman smiled at this, "So how long has she been in for? I just found out a few days ago?" She questioned.

The nurse stopped writing on her clipboard and looked up at the brunette with a sigh. "Before I tell you anything are you a family member or just a friend?" She asked.

She looked over at Buffy and then back to the nurse, "I am her sister." She lied.

The nurse looked at her incredulously, "She only has one sister and her name is Dawn. So really who are you?" She asked again.

"Buffy and I were lovers a long time ago, but we've been friends forever and she is the God-mother to my children. Please tell me how long she's been here?" She pleaded.

The nurse saw the hurt and worry in her eyes. She decided to tell the woman what she needed to know.

"She has been in the hospital for about a month now. She was diagnosed with a rare form of leukemia when she was younger, but thanks to a rigorous regimen of chemo, she went into remission. It came back full blown before we had a chance to treat it." She said sadly.

"I knew she was sick, but didn't know it was this bad. So is there any chance she can over come this? I mean isn't there something that can be done to...you know... prolong her life?" She questioned.

The nurse smiled ruefully, "At this stage no. We are doing everything we can to make her more comfortable. It's up to the guys upstairs if she is going to make it through this or not." She finished writing her findings and looked up at the brunette, "I'm sure she will pull through this with a large amount of Faith." She smiled and left the room.

The brunette looked back at the delicate girl in the bed, "A large amount of Faith huh? I don't know if it will work or not. You need to try and fight this B; you got too many people here who love and care about you. I know we haven't had the best relationship but you were there for me." She whispered and kissed the blonde on the forehead.

Reluctantly, the brunette let go of the woman's hand and walked toward the door, uttering a faint 'I love you" through trembling lips as she closed it softly behind her.

ELSEWHERE

Buffy found herself in a big room with two huge windows swirling with fog. Warm and bathed in bright light; it was reminiscent of the dining room in her house in Sunnydale. She looked around in confusion because she wasn't in her hospital gown, but rather a pair of blue jeans and white shirt with tennis shoes. Gone was the bed and the machines she was so used to hearing. Mercifully, she wasn't in any pain.

"Hello? Is anyone here?" She called out into the room.

A few minutes had past when two robed figures came into the room. They were cloaked in white, almost like they were angels. They approached her and looked at her with a small smile.

Buffy went on the defense; it was the slayer in her. Always be prepared and never let your guard down.

The first Angel spoke, "There is no need to be on the defense young one. You are in a sacred place. The forces of darkness and evil are not allowed to tread here. You are Buffy Summers correct?" She asked.

The petite blonde smiled, "Yes, I am Buffy Summers. Am I dead?" She asked hesitantly.

The man and the woman laughed before the man answered, "No dear you are not dead, if you were you would be met by the Arch Angel Michael. You are in a place that defies all time and presence." He answered cryptically.

This served to confuse the woman even more, "If I am not dead then why am I here? Cause the whole out of body thing is not of the good. And who are you guys then?" She furrowed her eyebrows as she queried.

The female angel smiled at her spunk, "Forgive us little one my name is Carmen and this is my brother Rafael. We are the higher beings; we are the messengers for the Powers." She answered.

"So why am I here? What is the purpose? I'm not a slayer anymore and if there is a big evil brewing then there are a whole mess of them out there to fight this." She stated.

Rafael chuckled at this, "No we know you aren't the slayer, you haven't been for quite sometime now. No, we are here to give you a choice. Now you can either take it or you can go back and be hooked up to the tubes and confined to a hospital bed."

Buffy thought long and hard, being in the bed with all those tubes in her wasn't a very pleasant place to be. Especially when you have doctor's coming in poking you, but the sponge baths weren't so bad. She smiled at the thought of the nurse coming in and washing her down.

Carmen clears her throat, "So what are you going to do? Hear us out or go back into your body?"

"I will hear you out, but this doesn't have to deal with me dying again cause I've done that twice already and I really don't want to be brought back. It does a job on the psyche." She joked.

Rafael rolled his eyes at this, "Be serious little one. Now we are here because you have a choice to make, make it wisely because it will change the fate of your life. You being sick with cancer is a consequence of the path you were not meant to take. You were destined for so much more, but the decisions you made ruined that. Now you are going to see what your life was like if you would have made the right ones. At the end of your vision you will be asked if you want the life you were supposed to lead or the life that you have now."

Carmen cleared a hole in the wall to show Buffy lying almost lifeless in the hospital bed. Buffy cringed at the sight. The image swirled and faded away, leaving her dreading going back to that.

"Let me get this right? I am going to be looking at the life I was supposed to lead and then when it's over I am supposed to choose which one I want?" She question.

Carmen answered, "Yes. You will be watching. No one will be able to see or touch you. We want you to see what the other life would have been like and how lives would have been changed and affected."

Buffy looked thoughtful, "That is the upside, but what is the downside?"

Rafael answers, "Downside is you go back to dying and never being able to see your loved ones again." He said grimly.

The blonde looked at Carmen and Rafael, the image of her in the hospital playing in her mind. This was going to be a hard decision to make, on one hand she didn't want to die, but she didn't want to take the risk of seeing what could have been because of a few mistakes she made.

The angels saw the emotions playing on her face and knew it was hard for her, but the Powers wanted to give her a second chance at life. She had sacrificed herself for the world, her family and her friends. They weren't ready to lose her yet, the blonde being one; if not the strongest warrior for their cause.

Buffy looked up at the two entities, "I want to see what life would have been like if I had made different decisions and choices. I want to know if my family and friends would have had better lives." She stated.

Carmen closed her eyes and tapped Buffy on the shoulder, "It shall be done."

TBC... let me know what you think, if I should continue it or not.


	2. Buffy Goes Back In Time

That Was Then, This is Now Chapter 2

That Was Then, This is Now Chapter 2

I know its been a long time since I wrote, but I am now coming out of my shell. Real Life has been a bitch to me, but I decided to get back into my writing since well, its calmed down. Here is the much awaited second chapter…. Review and enjoy!!

Buffy found herself standing in front of her old high school; it was a little too bright for her liking. The blonde looked around for Carmen or Rafael, but they were nowhere to be found. Buffy watched as the younger version of herself and her friends walked across the quad, talking about something that happened in class, curious the blonde followed.

"So I'm like, 'Dad, do you want me to go to the dance in an outfit I've already worn? Why do you hate me?" Young Buffy started talking

"Is Tyler taking you?" Stephanie asked.

Stephanie, Samantha, Tiffany and Buffy were very popular and were some of the best cheerleaders that Hemery had to offer. Girls wanted to be them, guys wanted to do them. It was like they ruled the school and everyone followed what they said. Buffy continued following them listening to their conversation.

"I think Cordelia and I are half in half with the shallow bitchiness." Buffy said to herself.

"Where were you when I got over Tyler? He's of the past. Tyler would have to crawl on his hands and knees to get me to go to the dance with him. Which, actually, he's supposed to do after practice, so I'm gonna wait." The younger Buffy replied.

"Okay. See ya later?" Samantha walked off with Stephanie and Tiffany

"Call me." The younger Buffy sat down on the steps of the school.

"Okay." Was the girls reply as they walked off into the distance.

The older Buffy sat down beside the younger version of herself recalling this whole situation. She was waiting for her dad to come and pick her up, like always but he was running late. This was when she first encountered Merrick her very first watcher. He was a stoutly man who scared the hell out of her, she thought she was in trouble, but she wasn't it was for a whole different purpose. Right on time Merrick showed up, Buffy couldn't help but smile, she missed him.

"Buffy Summers?" The man asked the young woman.

Buffy looked at the strange man, "Yeah, Hi, What?" Buffy asked nervously.

"I need to speak with you." The strange man stated quietly.

The older Buffy watched as Merrick talked to her, she remembered the fear and curiosity that ran through her. "It seems like yesterday." The older Buffy thought.

"You're not from Bullock's, are you? 'Cause I-I meant to pay for that lipstick." Buffy asked a little scared.

The man looked at Buffy again, "There isn't much time. You must come with me. Your destiny awaits." The urgency in his voice.

The older Buffy watched as this transpired, to her it was a destiny that ended up ruining her life, causing her to lose her friends and loved ones. The older blonde thought about Miss. Calendar.

Buffy looked at this man in confusion, "I don't have a destiny. I'm destiny free actually."

The older Buffy chuckled at her spunkiness. "I was so naïve."

"Yes, you have. You are The Chosen One. You alone can stop them." Merrick told her.

"Stop who?" The younger Buffy asked.

"The vampires." Merrick replied.

Buffy laughed at the dumbfounded look on her younger self's face. The laugh disappeared to sadness as she followed the younger Buffy and Merrick through the cemetery.

Buffy watched as her and Merrick waited for the first vampire to arise, but the younger Buffy was more concerned about her nails instead of the vampire. The vampire rose behind the blonde, but she wasn't paying attention. The older Buffy watched in horror.

"Look behind you." Buffy called out, but knew she couldn't hear her.

"Behind you Buffy." Merrick called out to the blonde.

Buffy turned around and came face to face with the vampire. The vampire lunged at her and Buffy moved out of the way as the creature kept advancing towards her. Buffy punched him in the stomach and then kicked him to the ground and stuck the stake in his chest, but missed his heart.

The vampire got up, "You missed, and you call yourself a slayer."

Buffy got pissed and kicked the stake so it made its way to his heart. The vampire exploded into dust in front of the young slayer's eyes.

"That was very good, you need to learn how not to hesitate. With training and the proper knowledge you will get better." Merrick commented.

"You mean I have to train and get all sweaty? I don't like this gig." Younger Buffy said a little pout to her face.

The older Buffy followed the younger Buffy as she made her way home. The older Buffy cringed because she knew her parents were going to be uber pissed. The younger Buffy entered the house to her parents arguing. They got on her case about where she was and the younger girl went up stairs to the bathroom as a lone tear trailed down her face.

Older Buffy's heart broke as she remembered that this was the beginning to the end of her parent's marriage. Buffy knew that it wasn't her fault, but her staying out late and her failing grades had something to do with it.

Younger Buffy got ready for bed and turned of f her light, trying to block out the arguing of her parents. Older Buffy lay down next to her younger self and drifted off to a semi-peaceful sleep.

Thanks to Buffy World for the transcripts


	3. The Voices In Her Head

That Was Then, This is Now

That Was Then, This is Now

Not really beta'd any mistakes made are mine. To everyone who reviewed thanks, here is the next chapter.

The older Buffy spent the night tossing and turning trying to ignore the voices in her head. She could tell it was Dawn, she decided to listen.

"_Hey Buffy, I know you can hear me. I really miss you being home, who am I going to discuss the problems going on with school and my relationships. Xander and Samantha are having another baby a girl this time, and Alex Jr. is getting so big, he misses you a lot too." Dawn grabbed Buffy's hand and gave it a squeeze._

"_Things aren't the same without you; Faith came by to see you. She was broken up seeing you in the hospital like this. I wish you could see how big the girls are getting, they wanted to come and see you, but they are too young to understand. They made you new pictures. I'm putting them on the window sill." Dawn got up and put the pictures on the window sill. There is so much you are missing out on, please come back to us we can't make it without you."_

_Dawn kissed her sister softly on the cheek and left the room._

Older Buffy could feel the warmth of the lips that touched her cheek. It made her smile a lot; despite their arguments and fights she knew that Dawn loved her. This worried Buffy a little bit, if she was over seeing things, how come she hears voices when she sleeps. The older blonde looked at the younger version of herself as she slept as fitfully as possible.

Older Buffy got off of the bed and made her way to the window looking out the window at the moon. She really missed LA, but not the bad memories that were associated with it, but Los Angeles will always be home to her. Buffy heard a noise in the closet and walked towards it; she glanced back at her younger self and opened the door. To her surprise she saw Carmen standing there.

"Carmen? What are you doing here?" Buffy asked surprised.

Carmen stepped out of the closet and looked at the petite woman standing before her, "I was just checking on how things were and to see if you have any questions so far." Carmen stated looking around the room.

"Wow, you were really a girly, cheerleader, and different types of queens. I never really pegged you for that type." Carmen joked.

Buffy looked around and smiled, "It seems like such a long time ago. I do have a question though." Buffy stated.

Carmen looked at Buffy, "Ask away dear, that I what I'm here for after all."

"If I am supposed to be a ghost, revisiting my past, then why when I sleep I hear voices talking to me. I heard Dawn telling me about Xander." Buffy asked.

"Well, you are still connected to your body on the physical plane, that is why you can hear the voices, but only when you are sleep. You are very deeply missed, but they are not giving up hope yet. You are truly special, that is why it's important that you follow yourself very closely and look as younger Buffy made the choices you didn't." Carmen explained.

"Why wasn't this little bit of information disclosed to me in the beginning, before I decided to become not corporeal?" Buffy asked glaring at the angel.

"My brother and I felt that it wasn't important and that you will figure it out on your own. We're sorry we made a mistake." Carmen apologized.

"It's ok, but I have one more question and then that's it." She asked.

Carmen sat down in a chair crossing her legs, "Ask away."

"Will my parents still end up divorcing and us moving to Sunnydale happen?" Buffy asked softly.

Carmen looked over at the younger Buffy and then back at the older one, "Your parents' separating is part of your destiny. That is something that you can't change it needed to happen to have you grow and change. As you go along, it will all start making sense to you. Don't try to change anything or it will alter all things present and future. My time is up here if you have anymore questions, don't hesitate to call."

Carmen disappeared into thin air leaving Buffy alone with her thoughts. 


	4. Author's Note

Special Note

Special Note

Hey guys!! I want to say thanks for reading and reviewing all of my stories. I wouldn't be writing if it wasn't for you guys. I'm sorry to say that I will not be continuing any of my stories. I have a lot of stuff that's happened over the course of time. Thanks for reviewing and I enjoyed reading your reviews. Much Love and Wishes

Nicole


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